This might seem like an odd question, but take a deep breath, smile, and dive deeper here with me. What are you telling yourself on a daily basis? Are you speaking (or thinking) negative or positive words? Are you an encourager or do you pull others, including yourself, down?
ALL your thoughts depict your mindset. So tell me, what message are you listening to? How strong is your mindset? Another way to strike this core is by asking yourself “What do I not want others to know about me?” This simple question strikes the core of vulnerability and insecurity. Are you spiraling into a dark hole as you make a mental list in your head of all the insecurities you want to hide? I’ve been there too, you’re not alone. Now that you’re self aware of your traps it’s time to grow beyond your insecurities.
As a leader (no matter your role – business leader, entrepreneur, employee, mom, dad, student, etc.) the most important thing you can do in a single day is protect your mind and guard it against the lies that can easily creep in and whisper discouragement lurking to bring your shortcomings to light. I have a secret for you, can you keep it? Here it is, we all have shortcomings. If you’re breathing you are flawed and perfectly imperfect. We must be reminded that challenges, problems, and flaws are a part of everyone’s life. Don’t hide in shame over your shortcomings, rather, embrace them, let them strut into the light, develop them as you can and focus on your strengths. You have many more strengths than weaknesses I assure you. It’s time to strengthen your mindset so you can effectively pursue your role and lead those around you with confidence. It’s time for you to live full-out, passionately, in purpose.
You’re probably wondering, so how do I change my mindset? Let’s dive into 5 keys…
1. Become Self-Aware
The first step of reframing your mindset is to listen and be aware of your thoughts so you can better understand them. Often we hear our inner critic doubting, we feel the sweats, and we let it be our truth. Our mind clouds with clutter…”How will I accomplish this audacious goal?”, “There’s no way I can achieve this.”, “I’m not adequate or smart enough.” … these thoughts halt you before you begin.
2. Challenge Beliefs ==> Choose Your Thoughts
You are more in control of your thoughts, feelings and actions than you realize. The perspective of your thoughts are not your reality. Don’t accept what you think just because your mind wonders there – your thoughts do not define you. Once you become aware and challenge beliefs you can counter them positively… “I can break my goal into chunks and achieve it one step at a time.”, “I can achieve this with my team or help from those who have strengths opposite of mine.”, “I have the tools and resources I need to succeed.”.
3. Check Your Tribe
Good people bring out the good in people. The people you surround yourself with are important to your growth and mindset. The environment you submerge yourself in can have a huge impact on the words and thoughts you say and have. Is your environment bringing you more negative feelings than positive ones?
In a 2017 Forbes article called The Role Of Positive Relationships in Starting a Business, it states:
“The success of any business depends on several factors: habits, beliefs, passion, flexibility, attitude, and, believe it or not, your relationships. There’s an age-old adage that goes along the lines of, “You are only as good as the company you keep.” Human beings are hard-wired to be social, with the desire and need to connect with others. We thrive on healthy relationships; and yet, we often overlook the role of positive relationships in our success.”
4. Bask in Gratitude
Surrounded by to-do lists, tasks, and a whirlwind of busy makes it easy to feel less than, guilt, shame and depressed over what’s lacked or choices gone wrong. Isn’t it overwhelmingly sad how every leader wants peace and happiness, yet most feel anxious and depressed on a daily with eyes focused on what is lacked versus what is had?
Sitting in gratitude for all you’ve accomplished (small & big) and being optimistic will pave a new road in your mind, building your confidence and creating a healthier mindset.
Set a timer for 1 minute…go ahead, do it now. Make a list of all you have to be grateful for today. I’ll start it for you…. you woke up, you are investing in yourself right now by reading this… go ahead, keep adding.
5. Invest in YOU
Recharge. I know, I know…you’re a doer, a worker and an action taker. You feel lazy if you aren’t hustling, working, doing dishes, cleaning the car, supervising the next project. I get it. But here’s the truth, if you don’t recharge you won’t have anything to give to those around you. What does this look like? It’s different for all of us. If you find yourself like I found myself, struggling to un-tap, start small. Five minutes walking, listening to music or reading a book. Create something. What fuels you, brings joy to you and energizes you? Do that.
Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch you words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.